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It took me a year and a bisected to watch Netflix’s To the Bone.

The movie, which debuted in January 2017, portrays Ellen, a 20-year-old woman aggressive anorexia nervosa, and her acquaintance actuality in and out of assorted analysis programs.

When it was aboriginal released, I was 23, actual alpha in my accretion and triggered by about everything. But I capital to watch it. I capital to be a allotment of the chat about my disorder, to apperceive what others were seeing, and how they may acquire been acquainted my experience.

I put on the movie, and in the aboriginal 10 minutes, I cried and affronted it off.

Ellen’s adventures were still too raw for me: counting the calories and allegory the comestible apparatus of every bait of aliment that touches your plate, activity out of your way to exercise more, alike afterwards your anatomy has told you it has had enough.

I wasn’t attainable to accost the absoluteness of my own experience. I was a little added than two months out of the hospital and not able to accomplish faculty of it all, yet.

• • •

My adventure started as an innocent attack to be “healthier,” a

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